Does He Love Me - How Can I Tell?

Anyone that has been in a relationship for a while will at some point start to wonder "Does he love me?" Most of us have been in this position at least once and it can drive you absolutely crazy. The more you like the guy, the more desperate you will be to find out if he does love you. Most guys are experts at not giving away how they feel about you which can make you so anxious that you can't even work! If you find yourself in this situation, the absolute worst thing you can do is corner him and just ask him straight out if he loves you. Whether he loves you or not will no longer be the issue. He will feel like you ambushed him and trapped him which is not the way you want him to feel. Chances are good that after this conversation, he will get harder to find and will soon disappear from your life. Why is this? Remember that guys don't communicate the same way that women do. Ambushing him and causing him to verbalize his feelings will scare him to death. So, how do you know how he feels without asking him? Luckily, there are a few things you can look for that will give you a very good idea how he feels about you. Let's take a second and talk about something that most women think is a clue that he loves them but really isn't. Have you ever been with a guy that you had great chemistry with that you were wildly attracted to and you loved to do the same things he did? While you may see this as love, he may just see you as a woman he can have a great time with while he is waiting for the one to come along. So what is missing? All guys will fall in love with a woman that he feels is an extension of who he is. They will look for a woman that has the values that they grew up with and many of them will look for a woman who has traits similar to their mothers. So, does he love you? Men who are committed and who are in love have the following things in common. 1. He compliments you. Have you ever dressed up and felt great about how you look only to have no one notice? Guys are usually pretty oblivious to what we wear and if he notices and actually comments, that's a sign. 2. He takes care of you. This could be demonstrated in a lot of ways. He stays with you when you are sick to do anything he can to make you feel better. Or, he fixes things that are broken for you. A man who loves you will do anything he can to make you feel better. It is just the way they are wired. 3. He actually listens to you. This doesn't mean that he does what you tell him to do! I mean, he really takes an interest in what you are saying and responds appropriately, even if the television is on. Guys in general do not excel at any of these things. If you notice that he compliments you, takes care of you and really listens to you, you don't have to ask him if he loves you. A guy who is just casually dating you won't do these things. Why would he bother trying to make you happy if he doesn't intend to stick around? But, don't panic if he isn't doing any of these things. There are several reasons why he isn't. It might be too soon in the relationship for him or it could be something that you are doing. Many times the things we do to bring him closer actually push him farther away. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7231508

This Guy's In Love With You

Oh those magic words we love to hear, "this guy's in love with you," but is he? What does that mean anyway; how can you know if he really is in love with you or just 'in lust' for the moment? There are all kinds of opinions or potential answers to this question. The truth, the one you can trust, can be found inside yourself; it is contained within what you have always known. Are there things you can discard as untrue or unreliable? You decide. 1) Lie: "Love means never having to say "I'm sorry." Truth: Love means never intentionally doing or saying anything that would require you to say those words. And when you intentionally do it? You can't those words fast enough, because you are genuinely sorry. 2) Lie: Critical, always saying things like, "I'm trying to help you change, to help you." Truth: You may have stumbled into a man who fancies himself to be an architect, or much smarter than you, he professes to know what you can be if you would just try... and trust him. Translate this to you are unacceptable as you are; I need to change you so you be acceptable. 3) Lie: "I check your phone or emails follow you or keep close tabs on you because I care, I am trying to protect you." Truth: This is the nature of a controlling personality that is unable to trust. Worse, it bears the fingerprint of an abuser. 4) Lie: "I'm trying hard to get through to you (to make you think like me) but I can't, see what you made me do?" Truth: When anyone you are involved in a relationship with says those 6 simple words, "See what you made me do?" you have encountered a full-blown abuser. This is classic lingo from someone who is incapable of loving anyone else. 5) Lie: "I can't understand why you always make me angry." Truth: Love does not anger easily, it negotiates with understanding and the intent to preserve who you are, the person he fell in love with. What do you look for to know it could be the real thing? You stop, look and listen, just like when you were a child and facing danger like a busy street. Loving someone means seeing the best they can be; words and actions are a reflection of what someone thinks you are and will become. The answer has been before us for more than 2000 years; the bible may have said it best, "Love is patient, kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, is not proud, does not dishonor others, is not self-seeking, is not easily angered does not keep a record of wrongs, does not delight in evil, rejoices with truth, always protects, trusts, hopes and perseveres." If these principles apply to the person who says they are in love with you, they probably really are. Apply them and decide. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9245852

The Importance of Showing Love

Few people would deny the importance of love in one's life. Most people have experienced love in one of its forms and would admit that it has given them more self-confidence and faith in themselves than they would have had without it. For example, a child who grows up in a family that shows love will probably feel more safe and secure than a child who feels unloved. Beginning one's life in a loving environment helps one feel more secure for the rest of her life. No matter what the type of love you receive, you will benefit from it. Likewise, others benefit from the love you share, and therefore it is time to live in a loving way. In order to share love with others, it might come in handy to consider the various types of love. Obviously, romantic love is the love that spouses, lovers, and committed people have for one another. Parental love, family love, friendly love, and general love for acquaintances and humanity exist to make life more pleasurable. The more love one feels, the less likely he will be a psychopath because loving entails giving something positive of oneself, like caring feelings, to benefit another person. When the recipient of love becomes aware that he or she is loved, that recipient usually feels a very pleasant feeling on many levels including physical, spiritual, and emotional levels. Receiving love impacts the recipient by calming her down and providing her with a better sense of self-worth. One way to show love, regardless of the type of love the individual feels, is by caring unconditionally and by accepting another person as he is. This means that the one who loves listens to the expression of the feelings of the other without condemnation. Love also entails accepting another person no matter what she looks like and without any other motivations to attain money or material goods. Accepting others as they are and expressing concern for their well-being is at the root of love no matter what type of love it might be. People who love will not turn their backs on their friends and abandon them when life becomes difficult. The one who loves does not walk along a metaphorical path of convenience because having friends for convenience would only be self-centered. Instead, love necessitates acting kindly, soothing others, and providing positive vibrations to those one loves. Both management and employees at work need to show love to others on the job. Maybe this idea sounds strange to some. Love for your coworkers and employees is expressed by helping them become successful at what they do. For instance, no one should put anyone else down or deliberately hurt the feelings of others at work. If a fellow-employee is failing at a task, the others should help him attain success as though they were helping their own brother or child be successful. Expressing love at work is the process of empowering others, never exploitation or harassment of any type. Perhaps, the best way to show love to your fellow employees is to respect them and to help them be the best they can be. Family love remains equally empowering. Family members should support one another as a cohesive unit that encourages each member to act with kind values toward all of humanity. Members of families should encourage the kind actions of the other members of the same family while never blindly accepting any form of cruelty toward non-members of the group. Unfortunately, some people believe that belonging to the same family justifies giving support to family members who behave in cruel ways toward non-members, but that belief is wrong just as hurting anyone, anywhere is dishonest, going against all love. In order to show family love, the members of the same group must not only respect each other but also let that love spread into all of society. The most obvious form of love is romantic and marital love. Being in a positive romantic relationship benefits everything people do in all areas of life. Knowing that there is a partner with whom one can share experiences at the end of the day has great benefits, especially when beloveds do not put each other down and are willing to listen with gentle support. Romantic love certainly saves lovers from any bad experiences they might encounter while separate throughout the day because conversation with the beloved is therapeutic. Having a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife is simply a great reassurance and way to help another person. Friends, likewise, show love to one another through mutual respect, caring, and acceptance. It is important to accept one's friends' dreams and goals while being kind to them at all times. If a friend is going through a challenging time, lending an open ear to listen to her challenges will make a positive change in her life because she will feel inspired by your support. One never knows when that love shown to a friend will inspire him or her to do greater things. In some respects, we should be friends to all peaceful people, lending them a hand in one way or another, by listening to them, by acknowledging them, and by helping them in reasonable ways. Love has tremendous power to help us grow and to heal us. Everyone benefits from love, from its seeds and by watering them so the seeds of love will grow. Kind words coming from the heart and inspired by love are the true treasures of our coexistence. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9241559

Love and Its Definition Around the World

What is love? Love can be defined in many ways such as it is a beautiful word or it is a feeling that one expresses towards someone or something or caring about someone or something. For example, when you care and have feelings for another guy or girl or pet, then that can be described as love. In the modern world today, love can be said to be very complex. The Love IS project was founded by Chrissie Lam and its intention is to spread love around the world through different projects. The platform aims at connecting people from around the world by allowing them to share stories and describe what love really means to them. Around the world, love is compared to the feeling of happiness, joy and any other feeling that is associated with it. While people around the world have a different perspective on the subject matter, no perspective is lesser than the other. Every person gets to experience love in one way or another at some point in their lives. Every individual has undergone an experience that they can say it changed their life. Love is and has always been an open-ended subject that why it's hard to come up with a specific definition of it. Chrissie Lam has been able to vouch that love is unique in each and every individual regardless of the social status, economic class, religion, ethnicity and country. The Love Is project is not only a platform where people get to define what love is but it is bound by a simple red bracelet that has the word "LOVE" beaded on it. Having worked for American Eagle Outfitters as a concept designer, Chrissie left the job to start her own project - The Supply Change - which enabled her to bring different worlds and concepts together. The Love Is project began in Kenya where Chrissie worked with Masai women who live in the southern part of the Great Rift Valley. During this time, Chrissie and the women developed a vibrantly colored message bracelet with the word LOVE on it. The bracelet is made from local beads that are used by the Masai women to make their own ceremonial bracelets. Through their bead work, the Masai women are also able to sell their products to the Kenyan people and tourists who visit them with the sole purpose of interacting with them and learning about their lifestyle. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9243158

5 Reasons Why Women Leave Men They Love

As saddening as this might be women do leave men, even though they love those men. There are various reasons and motives behind a woman's decision of leaving a man. Here are 5 reasons why women leave men they love: They feel unwanted and unloved - there is no secret that women want love and attention more than men. They do not actually want them, but they need them. Women are built differently from men and they are more sensible and emotional. And when their husband or their boyfriend simply does not pay any attention to them, women choose to walk out on their relationship. They feel like sexual objects - these days sex has become more of a physical thing, a thing most men want to simply get it over with, while women still need the foreplay, including the touches and kisses. But when a woman feels like her man is only there for her when he needs sex, she decides to dump him and find a better mate. Support, respect and love are very important in a relationship. And once these are gone, a woman can feel it and often decides to walk out. The man is always working - financial security is a thing all people want, but once this financial security means that the man is always working, a woman will not be very happy about it. But while women want to feel secure, they also want to spend time with their lover. And spending time with you is far more important with her than a nice car or a nice apartment. They need to feel close to you, feel you and check in with you. If you are always at work, she will have a relationship with the phone, not with the real you. The man is not sharing enough - I know that there are different types of people, but once you are in love there is nothing more beautiful than showing your loved one how much you care. Unfortunately, not all men understand that. Many times, they choose to keep silent and not show any emotion. Which pretty much ruins the relationship, mostly because a woman needs to feel close to you by sharing. The man is immature - being child-like is completely fine, but being childish is not. Women want a serious man that gets them, has dreams, abilities and that supports them and their desires. If you are acting like a child, getting mad from various stupid reasons, acting like a child in a serious situation, your woman will very soon leave you. Especially if you are not eager to change, to evolve. Women do not want to raise you. They want an already grown up man, ready to commit and take responsibilities. Often it is not only one simply reason why women leave men they love. Most of the times it is about a bundle of reasons which leads females to dump their partners. Read more articles on relationships at http://www.love-repair.com

How to Make a Woman Fall in Love With You - You NEED to Build Attraction FIRST

When you want to make a woman fall in love, I can safely say that most guys are going to do the wrong things. They are going to focus on the wrong techniques to make a woman fall in love, and they are not going to get the results that they are really after. If you want to be able to make her feel that way about you, then you NEED to build attraction first before anything else. What most guys do, is they try to act very relationship with a woman too soon and they think that this is what will make her fall head over heels for them. You know, right away, they will start acting like the perfect boyfriend, sometimes after only one date with her. Well, while that might sound like the right thing to do, time and time again, this is not the case. Here's what you need to do FIRST before you can safely say that she will fall for YOU: 1. You need to show her that you are a desirable male. Well, how can you do this? You need to show her that you have an interesting life of your own, so that you create a WANT inside of her to be a part of that life. For example, if you constantly travel around, meet new people, and explore new things, then right there you have all the qualities that most women really are looking for in a guy. Conversely, if all you do is sit at home and play Xbox, then she probably will not have as much of a desire to want to be a part of your life. 2. You need to be able to use push pull as a way to build tension with her. Tension can be a good thing, it is not always bad. It builds that heat. that desire, and that feeling that she just wants to jump into your arms. Push pull is usually thought of just being a seduction technique, but it works just as well to make a woman fall in love. See, most guys, right off the bat, all they do is push towards a woman. They want to be with her all of the time, and they bend over to make her happy. They never pull away to give her that real feeling of longing. And she needs to feel that if she is going to fall in love with you. 3. You need to be more of an independent man and less of a needy little boy. Seriously, a lot of guys are pretty needy for a woman's attention, approval, and affection. Too much so, at times. If you want to make a woman really fall for you, then you need to be an independent guy, one that does his own thing. A woman will lose interest really quickly in a guy that somehow always seems to find a way to be around her. She wants a man, not a little boy. Want to know how to use push pull seduction techniques to make a woman fall in love with YOU? Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/4814497

How to Make a Guy Fall in Love With You, For Long Term Commitment

Do you feel that you have found a man, that you want to create a happy long term relationship with? You would like to learn how to make a guy fall in love with you! That is so great, did you know that the lack of people not wanting to learn, and people who have learned wrongly are suffering with relationship and marital break ups everyday, causing them a truck load of unhappiness and emotional heartache... That does not have to be the life for you! And you are on the right track to finding you way to true love. The get a man and keep him is about being different! I bet you have seen others with there boyfriends or husbands, some of them happy and many of them moaning to everybody else about there partner. So first lets look at a couple of things that would put am man off! Talking about the same stuff will put a man off, men can only listen to the same thing once. Yes they do want to hear about what has happened with you good and bad, and they do like to be kept in the loop with all your gossip, just for the sake of knowing. But they can't stand it when they do hear about the same old reoccurring problems, that some girls seem to keep on about. Guys are not overly keen on somebody who does not have any sort of enthusiasm towards there life, or someone who is insecure... To be different "how to make a guy fall in love with you" for long term commitment is all about being a girl who is confident, secure and exciting. First of all you need to happy with yourself, a guys love a girl who knows what they want, and want to attract a man to share there happiness with. They love somebody who can behave naturally, and not try to be someone there not, for true love you need to be "you" and you want the guy to love you for who you are! There are guys who take everything seriously, and there are guys who love to have fun. You can choose which type of guy you want and make them fall in love with you, of course for any relationship to work you need to have things in common... Men love to have there women interested in thing that they like, if you are hooked on guy and want to get closer to him, find out where his interest are, and get involved. Not everything thou a man still likes to have some of there own independence, he will fall in love with you if he knows that he can still have some "boy" time. Being a girl that can flirt with innocence is very seductive to a man, and pulls there attraction your way very quickly! If you can do that, and make it quite clear that your motives are loyal to him, you could win his love easily. Men also like the loving attention, just as women do, to get a man to fall in love with you, don't smother him, but keep him reassured of your commitment, and he will return the gestures... Learning more about how to get him to fall in love with you helps prevent those broken hearts! There is tons of info on How To Make A Guy To Fall In Love With You [http://www.mymansecrets.info] and seduce him for the long term available Right Here [http://www.mymansecrets.info] Good Luck :) Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/1900089

How to Know If He Loves You

So here you are, but before you get your hopes up... I need to tell you that there is a 99% chance that this guy isn't in love with you if you haven't had sex with him yet. STOP! Hold your horses, this information doesn't mean that you should immediately go out and sex him. Before you do that you need to assess a few things like: - Is he compatible with you? - Are you attracted to him? - Is he attracted to you? - Do you have an emotional bond/connection? - Is he mature enough to commit? - Can you see a future with this guy? In the event that you do have sex with him you need to have ticked all of the above boxes especially the emotional connection box. If a guy doesn't have an emotional connection to you and the sex is bad to average he will hit the road like Road Runner - beep beep! He loves me, he loves me not? It is always hard to tell and the signs vary from man to man but some of the most common ways he will show that he is in love with you is if he... Replaces I with we. If you are featuring in his future projections then something is definitely going on. Treats you with respect. It may not seem like the most vibrant sign but respect is King to a man. If he respects your opinion and doesn't belittle you, he values you and your opinion. Shows you that he cares. A man who is in love with you won't make you wonder if he is in love with you he will leave no room for doubt. If you are reading this article, it's probably a sign that he doesn't love you. He introduces you to his friends and family. If a man doesn't invite you to meet or socialize with his friends and family then he isn't at that stage where he wants to be in a relationship with him. Men usually take longer to get to this point than women do. He wants to protect, provide and take care of you. He isn't a PDA (Public Displays of Affection) phobe. He let's you know that he is thinking about you. A man who is in love with you will call and text you on a regular basis. He tells you he loves you. Pretty obvious right! Do you want to understand men better? Click on the below link for more information http://www.lastingattraction.com/index.php/2-uncategorised/7-dating-2 Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9164653

How You Can Have a Healthy Relationship

Whilst a healthy relationship is undoubtedly what everyone wants, it seems to be a difficult state of being to achieve. The theory is simple, it does not really take a lot to create a healthy relationship, you just have to commit to the relationship and never stop working at it. Think about it, if you make the one that you love happy, then you will end up happy and your relationship will end up both healthy and happy. That is surely worth a bit of effort. So, how to have a healthy relationship... The only person who is responsible for your happiness is you. You cannot blame your partner if you are feeling miserable it is all down to you. If you are having problems then you need to sort them fast because until you do your negative thinking will sour the relationship. Speak to your partner, that is what they are there for, and deal with any issues together. There might be negative things happening in your life at the moment but letting them get to you will not bring you any benefit, or deal with your problems. It is amazing how much more you can achieve when you focus on the positive things in life. If you have something to say then say it. If you see a problem then talk to your partner about it. If you partner does not look happy then talk to them about it. If you do not talk to each other how will you get things done, how will you share each other lives and strengthen your connection? To be a true partner to your partner then you have to know them and understand them. You have to root about deep within them to find out what makes them tick and what they want and need from the relationship, the only way that you will achieve that is by talking to them. By talking you will share each others lives, learn from their experiences and hear new ideas. When you began your relationship you could probably talk for hours on end. As more and more responsibilities intrude into your lives it can be more difficult but you should never stop it, talking brings your lives together and enriches your knowledge and understanding of your partner. No matter how old you are, no matter how many years you have been together, there is never any excuse to stop enjoying each others company. Sharing each others interests, going on dates, experiencing new memories together all help to strengthen your bond. It is not just desirable that you spend time together, it is vital that you do as without regular close contact where you reaffirm your relationship you can end up drifting apart. Even if it is just going for a walk or curling up in front of the T.V together you need to make time for a bit of You Time. It does not matter what other things that you have happening in your lives, there is nothing as important as the two of you. You will hopefully be together for many years to come, so enjoy it. Whilst spending time together will help you to reconnect with your love, you also need time to yourselves to relax, unwind, meet with friends and pursue your own interests. Having your own space will let you bring new ideas and experiences together. You have to be completely open and honest, if you are unable to tell the truth, or there is a part of you that you are hiding away then you will be putting up walls between you and your loved one. A relationship is built on trust and trust is all to easily lost so be honest. If you have a problem then do not try to hide it from your partner in the vain hope that you will protect them, or it might upset them. Your body language will clearly show that there is a problem and if nothing gets done about it will have a negative impact on your relationship. Respect your partner, respect who they are, their wants, needs and emotions. Do not forget to save some respect for your self as well. Give your partner your unconditional support, let them know that it is there and keep them in your life. When you have problems approach them calmly and rationally, take each issue one at a time and work together to achieve a compromise that you are both happy with. You are no longer looking out for your own personal advantage, you are now looking for what is best for the relationship. How to have a have a healthy relationship is simple, you just work at it for the rest of your days. Sometimes the going will get rough but if you work together you will come out stronger. Take responsibility for your own actions and making the relationship work, you are the only ones who can do that, no-one else. As the years go by you will both change and so will the relationship, that is life, you need to have the flexibility to adapt to those changes and have your relationship grow even richer. Be kind and thoughtful with each other. A kind word, a touch, help with something, a surprise, it is all worth so very much and shows your partner your appreciation and love for them. Be yourself, do not try to be someone else, your partner fell in love with you, the years may change you but be true to who you are and have a long and happy life, together. Being a student of life I thought it about time to get my ideas down in the hope that they will help people with whatever difficulties they are facing. If you want to read further into the mysteries of understanding the opposite sex and relationships then my site might be one interest to you. Whatever your situation I wish you luck. http://www.reviewthemagicofmakingup.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/4515383

What Needs to Be Avoided for Love Dating?

Love dating is about getting to know each other in depth. It is therefore a process about exploration and discovery. But common sense and the norms of society dictate that there are certain things you can and can't do, or that you should avoid to ensure you have an enriching dating experience. Among the first recommended don't is blabbing at work about someone who you are dating. This doesn't mean that you can't talk about the person to a few of your colleagues at work or to the person who sits beside you or in a neighboring cubicle. It may be unavoidable to not mention your date especially after a weekend when everyone usually starts off the work week by asking, "so, how was your weekend?" If you went out on a date during the weekend, well, it's fine to mention it. What blabbing means, however, is that you shouldn't constantly, seemingly in a never ending way, be talking about your dating experience or your date to just about anyone and everyone. Your work colleagues shouldn't have the feeling that as soon as you open your mouth they will have to be subjected to hearing about what you did and where you went on your latest date, and what you think about the person. It's even worse if the person whom you are dating is someone at work or within the same company that you work. Even if that person is in a different department or at a different site, it's best to maintain a high level of privacy about your dating relationship. Otherwise it is sure to become known to everyone, because even if the person is at another site, there is sure to be others who will have some contact with fellow workers at that site. While you also should not blab about date, you also shouldn't be telling everyone about personal habits or ways of your date that you have learned about through seeing the person and going out. Personal relationships are just what they are - personal. So if you talk to just about anyone and tell them about the type of person your date is, tell them things that are known only to you, then you are violating the personal aspect of the dating relationship. And just as important, or even more important, is disclosing private, personal information about your date. This includes for example, health, financial or family-related information that your date may have disclosed to you in confidence. And although some personal information such as one's address, phone number and email address is partially public, you also shouldn't give that information about your date to just anyone. In relation to the person who you are dating, there also are things that will directly affect the individual that you shouldn't do. You shouldn't post a picture of the person anywhere on the Internet without their permission. You also shouldn't be inconsiderate and do things like calling your date at anytime, such as extremely late at night and very early in the morning. Night owl and early bird phone calls are very irritating and annoying, unless the person is on an irregular schedule and again, you have been told that's it okay to call at that time. Another annoying thing that is not recommended is to be constantly bombarding your date's email mailbox by sending Internet fwd. messages and Internet jokes, humorous and other types of pictures, poems, letters of hope or of desperation with a request to pass it on to as many people as possible. Messages that keep getting forwarded via the Internet simply clog up mailboxes and also carry the risk of having a destructive virus attached to them that can ruin your computer's hard drive and all your files. There are some people who like getting these messages. But again, unless your date has said he or she doesn't mind getting those messages, you shouldn't pass them on. The above-mentioned don'ts for love dating should therefore be kept in mind / avoided. They aren't difficult to observe and you'll find that following them likely will enhance your dating experience and enrich the bond you are developing while dating. To discover more free secrets / tips on love dating, you can go to [http://www.lovedatingsecret.com/]

The 5 Love Languages

I am glad that I read the 5 Love Languages book by Gary Chapman before I got married. I grew up watching my parents always at loggerheads. When I had read this book, I realised that both of them spoke very different love languages. My mother wanted a very loving and caring man who would speak kind words, give her presents and help her with her chores. My father wanted to hear praises and encouraging words when he came back home from work. Neither of them have got what they have wanted despite being married for almost 54 years.

After two breakups, I realised that I had to read some self-improvement books. I am glad I came across the 5 Love Languages'.

Words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service and physical touch are the 5 love languages.

I first analysed what my love languages were upon reading this book. I found that I wanted kind words, physical touch and quality time. These were the aspects that would fill my love tank. Soon after, I met my husband. We courted for two years but it wasn't smooth sailing all the time. He needed words of affirmation, acts of service and physical touch to fill his love tank.

We both knew what we wanted. Knowing what we wanted wasn't enough. It was vital to know what we were giving. What did we always give to fill our partner's tanks? Did we give the love language our partner wanted?

I was giving him quality time, physical touch and gifts. However, I was spending too much time with him and he actually started feeling claustrophobic. He wanted some space. He loved the physical touch. However, he wasn't very comfortable taking gifts often. I wasn't big on acts of service and he definitely wanted more of this.

Words of affirmation weren't one of his strengths to my disappointment. I needed to hear sweet nothings and words of assurance. I remember asking him once if he wanted me to go over to his house to spend the evening with him. His answer was if you want.' I was shocked and reduced to tears. I was happy with the physical touch I was getting from him. I wanted to spend as much time with him but he obviously didn't want to spend 24/7 with me. I was insulted when he told me that he needed space sometimes. He was generous with his acts of service. He was more than happy to give me lifts, cook and clean. However, this wasn't the most important thing to me.

Gosh! This wasn't easy. The first 3 months of our relationship was the most challenging period as we kept communicating different love languages. At 35, I was more mature to realise that a relationship was something that required effort at times. Fortunately, I was wise enough to stay in it and put into practice the knowledge I had gained from the books I had read.

I communicated to him that his lack of words of affirmation and brusque manner weren't helping me. I knew that he had lots of qualities that I had wanted in a man. Having said that, my love tank needed to be filled adequately.

Although it was more difficult for him to communicate what he wanted in this relationship, he slowly started opening up.

We have been married for 3 years now. I can safely say that both of us have made changes to our love languages to accommodate each other.

It's not always easy for him to whisper sweet nothings into my ears but he tries. When he does, I express my appreciation for it. I also make it a point to thank him once in a while for his languages which aren't very important to me like acts of service.

Likewise, I have started paying more attention to doing chores around the house and other acts of service which are important to him. At least once a week, I allow him to have the house all to himself. This is my way of giving him space.

Knowing that we have made these changes to fill each others' love tanks gives us hope and we know that we can adjust or change our love languages if necessary.

The 5 Love Languages has certainly made a very powerful impact in our marriage. The knowledge from this book has given us three beautiful years together in marriage. We are parents to a beautiful daughter now. From time to time, we communicate to each other if our love tanks aren't as full. We love each other very much and definitely make an effort to use the correct love language to fill up each others' love tanks.
The writer is the author of the book. Find love through the law of attraction. She met her husband through the law of attraction and gives an account of it in this book.

Why Don't You Feel Loved, Loving and Lovable?

We talk about the Father's love, seek it, want to be enveloped in it, and spread it around. But, so seldom do we feel it with our senses and most of the time we tend to feel unworthy of His love. How can you really know if and when God loves you?

There are days when you really feel great and extraordinary things are happening. You're on top of the world and know that it is God showering you with His love. Then there are lots of times when discouragement sets in. You do and say things that make you feel small and not deserving of His, or anyone else's love.

Those are the times that you need to refresh yourself in the Word and remember that the Father loves you as much as He loves Jesus! (John 17: 22 - 26)

Do you know Jesus? Do you realize that you can ask Him to direct your life? "Whoever shall confess that Jesus is the Son of God, God dwells in him, and he in God... God is love; and he that dwells in love dwells in God, and God in him." (1 John 4: 15 - 16)

The Father draws you to Jesus, (John 6: 44) and Jesus in turn reveals the Father, as He is the only One who knows the Father. (Mat. 11: 27) He loves you so much that He sent Jesus not only to pay the price for your sins, but also to give you the Holy Spirit.

It is one thing to know and understand these verses. Most of us have memorized, heard and read them many times before. However, at times of discouragement and trials you need fresh manna from heaven. That's when you need to have a revelation that He will never leave you nor forsake you. He is not up there in heavens far removed and unable to hear your cries.

Through the Holy Spirit, Jesus lives inside you and together you are hid in God. In fact:

"You are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God." (Col. 3: 3)

Thank you, Father, for sending Jesus, and hiding me with Him in you! What an awesome thought! Picture yourself hidden inside a huge snowball. Filled on the inside with the Holy Spirit, covered with the Blood of Jesus that washed you white as snow, and totally immersed in the Almighty!

This is awesome and worthy of deep reflection. Ask your heavenly Father to reveal His love to you. It is crucial to the development of your faith. If you think that He loves others more than you, or that He only loves you sometimes when you've been especially good, then your faith will yo-yo accordingly.

His love is a free gift - with no strings attached. There is nothing you can do to earn it. The more you develop that intimate relationship with Him, the more you will grow in His love, which will shine through you to others, and expand your faith.

No amount of tribulation, distress, persecution, famine or nakedness can take His love from you because through Him you are more than a conqueror! (Rom. 8: 35) Whatever the devil may have planned for evil in your life, God will turn to good because you love Him and are called by Him for His purpose. (Rom. 8: 24)

Tags : God's Love, God Loves You

Moments of love: Love will keep us alive

People who have experienced or even witnessed that moment of love, it is something that it is hard to forget. Loving someone deeply can be really heart melting and everything that runs in your life seems to be really great.
You stay positive at everything and when you feel that kind of love, its like its whats keeping you alive.
If you share intimate relationship with a person that you really love, stuff like holding hands, hugging or kissing can be an adventure.
Sometimes love can makes us feel more alive than ever. We let it control us, but sometimes too much would end up with a broken heart.
Don't expect anything like you will stay forever with that person, or even think that you will not end up together. If you expect it, then eventually things such as that might happen, or even happen in an opposite way.
Its nice to look forward to something, but don't expect too much because you might just get disappointed.
Just let the moment pass, and let everything worth remembering. Live your life with full of hope, faith and love. Without this, our soul will lack passion at everything we do.
Thats why sometimes the one we are with, or the one we love inspires us at everything we do. We are more keen at doing things because we know that someone supports for us and care for us.

Love do really keep us more alive, it makes life more interesting and adventurous. People may say that love hurts, well everything hurts for some reason but its not that always like that.
We also have special memories with the one we love but eventually if things don't work out, then life goes on. Its much better if you let things work out, and fight for your love with that person.
Its nice to have someone who inspires us with everything we do, everything we want to do, or even everything we need to do.
Life without love can be pretty normal, but life with love can be pretty amazing, it add more spice in your life, and make it worth living. Love doesn't make the world go round, love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do.

Love Bears the Load

"Love Bears the Load"

Love does a lot of heavy lifting. I was reading this morning about the amount the baby-boomer generation is sacrificing to care for sick and infirm parents and older relatives. In financial terms alone through forfeited income, early retirement, lowered pension and social security benefits, and out of pocket expenses the cost is quite significant, averaging in the hundreds of thousands of dollars. The article went on to describe the toll on the caregivers physically in some detail as well. Beyond the financial and physical cost is the emotional and psychological stress care giving exacts. But this is just one illustration of love's heavy lifting. There are countless others. That's because by its' nature love is giving. Love that is not prepared or willing to bear another's burden is not really love.

The Greek word "Steg", translated "Bear" in 1 Corinthians 13:7 ["Love bears all things"] also means "To roof over".

Love "roofs over". What might that mean? First of all, it indicates love must have structure. A roof doesn't just hang in the air. A roof is supported by structure, by walls. The walls take time to build, and love takes time to grow sturdy enough to "bear" another's burden. In construction the walls upon which the roof is set are referred to as "load bearing" walls. Our love must be of "load bearing" quality.

A little deeper digging reveals that the idea being expressed here by "Steg" is "to roof over with silence." Love bears by covering the one loved, even with silence when necessary. This harkens back to what we learned about love not being easily provoked, and not keeping score of wrongs suffered. Love that bears is ready to cover the shortcomings of the person loved. Love is also ready to not make an issue of not being reciprocated. That is another way love "roofs over"; treating others the way it would like to be treated, even when they don't.

A final sense of the word "Steg" is the idea that love "Bears up under". A person walking in love is prepared to bear up under pressures that will test that love, or stretch it. Forbearance and longsuffering are two essentials character qualities of the person walking in love.

Love is ready to carry the burden of another, "roof over" with silence another's short comings, or not being treated in kind, and "bear up under", the pressures against such love being displayed. It's quite a tall order fellow Mountain Taker. Aren't you glad we aren't on our own?! No wonder love is such a strong demonstration of the Kingdom of God. It's His nature displayed!

Loved? Loved.

Love is the greatest power in the universe, and it can also be the most powerful tool, when withheld from someone. Nothing can do more harm and cause more devastation then the power of love.

Loved? Loved. Is my 2 word story. For those of you who don't know what I mean by a 2 word story, I will explain.

On April 16, 2011, the EACH program was set into gear, with the Prayer Walk that was held in downtown Detroit Michigan. 25,000 people from about 500 churches, of all denominations, met in solidarity to pray for the city and pledge one million hours of community service to help those in need and proclaim the good news of Jesus Christ.

EACH stands for Everyone a Chance to Hear. Hear the gospel of Jesus Christ, and part of this program is to come up with your story in just two words. You wear your two words on a t-shirt, button, or a hat, and pray as God will open the doors for people to ask you what those two words means on your shirt, and then you have the invitation to tell them your story of how you met Jesus Christ.

This is my story.

Loved? I was not, as a boy growing up. I was small and not very big, very shy and not assertive at all. I grew up in a home of verbal abuse. I was always told that I couldn't do anything and that I would just grow up to be a garbage man. If I ever did want to try something, I was told I couldn't do it because I was too small, or I would break it, or some other reason that my parents had in their arsenal of negative statements.

Words can kill, and I never was involved in any physical abuse, so I don't know what that's all about, but I do know that words can hurt and the scares can linger for a life time.

My view of God was some big guy in the heavens just waiting for me to slip up, and he couldn't wait to bring the hammer down on top of my head. He loved punishment and judgment, and since I couldn't do anything right, He was having a fun time with me.

Well, needless to say, these things all turned me into other avenues to find validation and love, and they were all the wrong ones. Drugs, alcohol, and women got me in a whole lot of trouble, and there were times, when I look back today, that I should have been dead. I used everyone and I hurt a lot of people.

When I was ten years old, I gave my life over to Jesus Christ, while watching a Billy Graham crusade on TV. My mother would always watch him and so we did as well. Something that he said just resonated with me and I got down on my knees before I went to bed, and asked God to come into my life and change me. I meant it with all my heart.

They sent me a copy of the gospel of John and I remember going through it but I don't think I read it all the way. I never told anyone what I did, and because we were catholic, I never had anyone to talk to about it.

Years later after I was married and my wife was expecting our first son, something happened.

I was working the night shift at one of the big three, and one of my party buddies, was going to day shift. He was my best friend and after being on the day shift for one year, he got bumped back to nights. Well I couldn't wait for me and him to get back to our party ways.

While he was gone, we used to go all the way up the stairs, to the top of the roof of the building, (a staircase that was only used by the skilled trade guys), to get high. But someone, we didn't know who, had put a picture of Jesus up there, and we used to use that picture as our code word. When we wanted to get high, we would go up to a guy and say," Do you want to go and see the Lord at lunch time?" He would know exactly what we meant.

Well when I say my friend after a year, I took him up to see the Lord. I figured we would start our reunion in the right way. Well, he had other plans.

He told me that he had become a follower of Jesus Christ and that he had put the picture of Jesus up because that's where him and his other Christians friends, from day shift, would go and have their bible study every day.

He told me all about Jesus dying on a cross to save me from my sins and that He really loved me, and would come into my life and change me.

I got down on my knees again and asked God to come into my life. My friend gave me a bible and I still have that bible sitting in my office.

I think God used my friend to complete what He used Billy Graham to start years before.

I learned that God wasn't waiting for me to mess up so He could punish me. He punished His son so that I could live. He loved me that much to pay that kind of price, just so I could be free. Nobody has ever loved me like that, and nobody ever can. Only God can do that.

Loved? was the word that I carried around my neck for some twenty years of my life. Now I have replaced it with a new word. Loved. He really does love me and loves me like no one else ever can.

Circumstances can change, people can change, and events can change, but His love for me and you will never change.

At His last meal with twelve of His closet friends, right before He went to the cross, He said this to them;

"No one has greater love than this -- that one lays down his life for his friends. You are my friends" John 15: 13-14
What's your 2 word story? Do you have a 2 word story?

Meaning Of Love. Love Is... Already Here.

The meaning of Love is the connection that we have, whether we realise it or not to every single being and mineral that is in the Universe. Some call this God, The universal life force. Not a man who sites judging us all, but a supporting power that runs through us.
Everything works better, the economy, communities, society in the broadest sense, when we realize that we are connected to all people, all animals and all forms of life. Not only that, we are also connected to all forms of energy. The energy of the Universe flows through rocks, water, the air, the sky, the planets above us and EVERYTHING else. And the connection must go both ways. It is a two-way cable that attaches us.
Life of form (and of the formless) springs from love the origin of life is love and life seeks love.
Our whole meaning of love and being is this love/life... life is sustained by love. Love sustained by life. The Universal Power is LOVE.
There is no single creature or living entity within this Universal Power that cannot know love or is devoid of love. Really. No matter how bad/good/evil man can be he is not without the love that would save him. Yet, why are so many suffering? We deny ourselves love by seeking the thing that is already inside us. Insanity or just a Universal truth?
If love is everywhere and everything, why is there this seeking for love? Why do we seek what we already are? When questions such as these start entering the human mind, then a spiritual journey has begun.
Searching for the meaning of love.
Maybe you came here seeking a definition of 'the meaning of love' for your homework, maybe a definition of love for your friends to share pictures of Unicorns and 'like' on FaceboOK. That is great, but before you leave to find a more palatable 'hollywood' meaning of love that is easier to digest. Think about this;
If you are seeking love in others, in things, in films, lovers, friendships and careers, then you are denying what you already are. Move away from this 'normal' way of thinking it is just another of the insanities that pervade our human consciousness and are totally and utterly meaningless.
There is one universal truth of love. That once we KNOW that we are love, and we accept that everybody and everything is love, then we are free to really love others in a more meaningful way. Now we can see what others are through non tinted spectacles. We can see who they really are. Wonderful creatures of the Universe.
OK, now we do not have to seek love FROM them much like a font, we can now choose our partners through other more loving criteria. You do not need to be with that guy because he is popular, you do not need to be with that girl because you think she is pretty, you can choose a partner that has these qualities, but also that allows you to be YOU. You can allow them to be THEM. So many times we seek the prefect partner, get them and then start to change them. To disassemble the person that we wanted the, to be.
There is a paradox here Love is the motivation behind our dreams, most of our actions and preoccupies nearly all our thoughts. People move across countries, strive for careers, seek unhealthy relationships, all because they want love and yet they already ARE love.
What are you looKing for in your life? Love. But since you ARE love, it is easier to say that the meaning of love is YOU.

How to Ruin a Love Relationship with Modern Technology

As a psychic advisor the majority of my calls are from people with problems in their love life. What I have observed that is ruining relationships is modern technology. Nowadays people use Text Messaging, Facebook, Myspace, and E-Mail as ways of communicating with someone that they are in a relationship with or trying to have a relationship with.
Let me explain to you that this is not real communication. The Dictionary defines communication as the following: The Act of Communicating; Transmission.
a. The exchange of thoughts, messages, or information, as by speech, signals, writing, (Texting is not writing) or behavior.
b. Interpersonal rapport.
c. The art and technique of using words effectively to impart information or ideas.
True communication is face to face or by telephone where you can hear the tone and pick up the vibration of what this person is feeling towards you. It's impossible to understand what someone is meaning if it's a joke or if it's something serious with a few simple text messages back and forth.

I have clients call me with frantic questions such as: I texted him/her twenty minutes ago and he/she hasn't responded back, what is he/she thinking about me, is he/she mad at me, what does this mean? Why doesn't he/ she respond? I tell them it's easy, call and find out or go and see him/her.

Relationships and marriages are falling apart faster than the economy. The main reason is people are not having proper communication. The art of communication is being lost because of the modern methods of communication or should I say lack of communication. I don't understand why someone cannot take a few minutes to pick up the phone and call and get a direct answer rather than agonize for hours before someone responds to their text or e-mail message. It doesn't make sense. Yet, every day as a psychic advisor I hear the same questions over and over from different people.

My advice is always the same if you want to ruin the relationship or potential relationship continue using Text Message. It's a sure fire way to end a new relationship or destroy a relationship that has been going for a few years.

When people go to business meetings, luncheons or dinners, many times they are Texting messages under the table. They are Texting when they drive their cars, when they're walking down the street, in a hospital, or even in a movie theater. This has gone way too far.

It's evident that our society is falling apart in so many different areas and communication is probably the biggest one. It's difficult to get people to read. I often send written advice to a client after our phone call and they will tell me they never read what I sent. When I ask why, they reply with, "Well I just don't have time." If you can find time to brush your teeth, have a meal, or watch television, you have time to read. "No matter how busy you may think you are, you must find time for reading, or surrender yourself to self-chosen ignorance." ~ Atwood H. Townsend ~

As long as you continue communicating in these methods you can be guaranteed that you will not have a successful relationship.

My advice is if you want to ruin a relationship Keep Texting!

Native American Psychic Cherokee Billie has been working as a Clairvoyant advisor for over 25 years. She receives messages that will change your life! She helps her clients to connect with their Soul's Path, bringing peace and joy into their daily lives. Fast - Straightforward Answers and the Plain Truth! http://www.cherokeebillie.com

Love Relationship Problems - Tips on How to Protect Against Snowball Effect

Love relationship problems are prevalent in any relationship, along with even though some possess broken up as a result of these problems, others possess had the opportunity to eliminate all of them along with got over them enjoyably with their coupled lives. To assist triumph over these problems, anyone with a family member needs to have to have wide open intellect when confronted with your relationship problems. A number of problems that possess took place a relationship tends to get started on small. They might have been unnoticed in the beginning or maybe were unimportant once it heats up begun, nevertheless eventually; every one of these small problems would possess accrued along with came inside of a increase associated with stored frustrations. Any time the two of you start disagreeing, or individual would willing confess in order to currently being normally the one in fault. This can be a critical thing concerning currently being open-minded, so you can just simply use the pin the consequence on initially and both your emotions to cool down. There exists a more significant meaning in order to using the pin the consequence on initially instead of driving this away. In some cases, only 1 of these two individuals involved is willing to your workplace in the relationship and develops this as the other will want to let it autumn apart. If your sweet heart is evident within this matter along with would not want to continue the relationship, subsequently it might be greatest to conclude this prior to any person obtains harm every further. It's also a good way of being open-minded due to the fact keeping a relationship for this benefit than me only will harm anyone continuously. Ending may very well be this most effective answer for your situation. If anyone with a family member are going to make the time and in amending errors along with bettering your relationship with the other person, subsequently things becomes a great deal easier. The two of you have showed your current minds along with thought to be this richer side of your respective relationship. As well as, the two of you allows yourselves to take into account additional choices along with tune in to others guidelines to save your valuable relationship. Following, learn to recognize the other person much better by simply conversing additional effectively. It may well require the two of you to communicate properly along with build your intentions understood. Concurrently, in the event that every individual have got criticisms, it is wise to participate in it without the need of receiving shielding and start avoiding every blame. The two of you need to understand this ability to hear one another's complaints have become the approaches to identify a possible supply of dilemma and stop this via worsening. If it may possibly protect against a new break up associated with your relationship, subsequently using the pin the consequence on can be worthy of it. Endeavouring to listen to one another without start your current accusations might be the single trickiest activities, unfortunately. This process demands anyone when you consider smoothly and also have a level of tolerance to your current spouse's yowls along with complaints. It might be made more intense in the event that you should also try complaints nevertheless your sweet heart just isn't as willing to listen as you are, becoming a more intense circumstance scenario.

The Magic of Patching up After a Breakup is a book which will help you to patching up with your ex. Know more about love problems [http://www.mopab.net]

Love Relationship Problems Are Common in All Relationships

Love relationship problems are common in all relationships, and even some that are corrupt due to these problems, and the other is a solution and moved to joy in their lives connected. To help overcome these problems, you and your loved one should have an open mind when dealing with problems in their relationship. The problem may be that after the number was in a relationship is likely to start small. You can look about who is or is to be reckoned with when I first started, but with the passage of time, all collected after a small problem is the accumulation of frustrations accumulated as a result. When two away, and not willing to admit that they do not the culprit. This is important to be open, so you can blame only allows the skin Kong 1, and emotions to cool. There the highest sense to blame the first instead of repelling. In some cases, one of the two people are willing to work and improve the relationship, while others prefer to allow the break-up. If your partner is clear on this issue, and not continue in a relationship, then it would be better to stop before someone hurt more. It is also a way of being open, because he is still in a relationship for it does not hurt all the time. And the rest is in fact the best solution for your situation. If you and your family are willing to spend time and effort to change the mistakes and improve their relationship with others, then things easier. It has two open his mind and is the best part of your relationship. Moreover, taking into account the two additional options and listen to suggestions from others to save their relationship. If there is magic in the world, and you can easily restore your relationship with your partner with a flick of the stick. Although there is no magic, I would probably not free. So do not put aside those thoughts, because they are not really that free love magic spells. Instead, there is a "magic" of love. This type of "magic" does not need to talk esoteric or fingers digging into the bowels of little frogs. In contrast, requires you to reach your heart and your love to lift your ex. And one way to show your partner your love is to write a message. It's just ink writing, and thank God. Will write the text message to your partner instead of e-mail or SMS. E-mail messages are all the same - the same font, size, same color. Some people believe that an electronic message is sincere and that can be expanded. Talk about the problems facing two and write down what you might think that this question. Not always what you can point fingers and blame your partner out. It is not for you to defend the work you've done. If it is the time to think about what the problems that are neutral in accordance with the instructions, even if we admit a mistake. But do not worry, because your partner is understood that both have a role in the rest.

9 Tips For Building a Loving Relationship New

9 Tips For Building a Loving Relationship New - How many of us have learned how to build loving relationships? Where did we learn? At home? At school? There is an art and science to building strong relationships. These indispensable tips were written with romantic relationships in mind, but with a little modification you can apply them to your friendships, family and even work relationships. 1. Create a safe environment where you can trust and share openly without being afraid. Don't interrupt, even if you need to put your hand over your mouth to stop yourself. Learn to fight fairly. No name calling. Don't make threats. Apologize when you know you should. If you're too angry to really listen, stop! Go into another room, take space for yourself, breathe and €calm down.€ Remember: your partner is not the enemy. 2. Separate the facts from the feelings. What beliefs and feelings get triggered in you during conflicts? Ask yourself: Is there something from my past that is influencing how I'm seeing the situation now? The critical question you want to ask: Is this about him or her, or is it really about me? What's the real truth? Once you're able to differentiate facts from feelings, you'll see your partner more clearly and be able to resolve conflicts from clarity. 3. Connect with the different parts of yourself. Each of us is not a solo instrument. We're more like a choir or an orchestra with several voices. What is your mind saying? What is your heart saying? What is your body saying? What is your €gut' saying? For example: My mind is saying €definitely leave her,' but my heart says €I really love her.' Let these different voices or parts of you co-exist and speak to one another. In this way, you will find an answer that comes from your whole self. 4. Develop and cultivate compassion. Practice observing yourself and your partner without judging. Part of you might judge, but you don't have to identify with it. Judging closes a door. The opposite of judging is compassion. When you are compassionate, you are open, connected, and more available to dialoging respectfully with your partner. As you increasingly learn to see your partner compassionately, you will have more power to choose your response rather than just reacting. 5. Create a €we€ that can house two €I's€. The foundation for a thriving, growing, mutually-supportive relationship is to be separate and connected. In co-dependent relationships, each person sacrifices part of him or her self, compromising the relationship as a whole. When you are separate and connected, each individual €I€ contributes to the creation of a €we€ that is stronger than the sum of its parts. The differences between you and your partner are not negatives. You don't need to be with someone who shares all of your interests and views. We may sometimes fear that these differences are incompatibilities, but in fact, they're often what keeps a relationship exciting and full of good fire. 6. Partner, heal thyself. Don't expect your partner to fill your emotional holes, and don't try to fill theirs. Ultimately, each of us can only heal ourselves. Your partner, however, can be supportive as you work with yourself, and vice versa. In fact, living in a loving relationship is healing in and of itself. 7. Ask questions when you're unsure or are making assumptions. All too often, we make up our own stories or interpretations about what our partners' behavior means. For example: €She doesn't want to cuddle; she must not really love me anymore.€ We can never err on the side of asking too many questions, and then listen to the answers from your whole self €" heart, gut, mind and body. Equally important is to hear what's not being said €" the facts and feeling that you sense might be unspoken. 8. Make time for your relationship. No matter who you are or what your work is, you need to nurture your relationship. Make sure you schedule time for the well-being of your relationship. That includes making €playdates€ and also taking downtime together. Frequently create a sacred space together by shutting off all things technological and digital. Like a garden, the more you tend to your relationship, the more it will grow. 9. Say the €hard things€ from love. Become aware of the hard things that you're not talking about. How does that feel? No matter what you're feeling in a situation, channel the energy of your emotions so that you say what you need to say in a constructive manner. There you have it. Be kind to yourselves. Remember: change takes time and every step counts.ena-ayobelajarbersama.blogspot.com

Loved? Loved.

Love is the greatest power in the universe, and it can also be the most powerful tool, when withheld from someone. Nothing can do more harm and cause more devastation then the power of love. Loved? Loved. Is my 2 word story. For those of you who don't know what I mean by a 2 word story, I will explain. EACH stands for Everyone a Chance to Hear. Hear the gospel of Jesus Christ, and part of this program is to come up with your story in just two words. You wear your two words on a t-shirt, button, or a hat, and pray as God will open the doors for people to ask you what those two words means on your shirt, and then you have the invitation to tell them your story of how you met Jesus Christ. This is my story. Loved? I was not, as a boy growing up. I was small and not very big, very shy and not assertive at all. I grew up in a home of verbal abuse. I was always told that I couldn't do anything and that I would just grow up to be a garbage man. If I ever did want to try something, I was told I couldn't do it because I was too small, or I would break it, or some other reason that my parents had in their arsenal of negative statements. Words can kill, and I never was involved in any physical abuse, so I don't know what that's all about, but I do know that words can hurt and the scares can linger for a life time. My view of God was some big guy in the heavens just waiting for me to slip up, and he couldn't wait to bring the hammer down on top of my head. He loved punishment and judgment, and since I couldn't do anything right, He was having a fun time with me. Well, needless to say, these things all turned me into other avenues to find validation and love, and they were all the wrong ones. Drugs, alcohol, and women got me in a whole lot of trouble, and there were times, when I look back today, that I should have been dead. I used everyone and I hurt a lot of people. When I was ten years old, I gave my life over to Jesus Christ, while watching a Billy Graham crusade on TV. My mother would always watch him and so we did as well. Something that he said just resonated with me and I got down on my knees before I went to bed, and asked God to come into my life and change me. I meant it with all my heart. They sent me a copy of the gospel of John and I remember going through it but I don't think I read it all the way. I never told anyone what I did, and because we were catholic, I never had anyone to talk to about it. Years later after I was married and my wife was expecting our first son, something happened. I was working the night shift at one of the big three, and one of my party buddies, was going to day shift. He was my best friend and after being on the day shift for one year, he got bumped back to nights. Well I couldn't wait for me and him to get back to our party ways. While he was gone, we used to go all the way up the stairs, to the top of the roof of the building, (a staircase that was only used by the skilled trade guys), to get high. But someone, we didn't know who, had put a picture of Jesus up there, and we used to use that picture as our code word. When we wanted to get high, we would go up to a guy and say," Do you want to go and see the Lord at lunch time?" He would know exactly what we meant. Well when I say my friend after a year, I took him up to see the Lord. I figured we would start our reunion in the right way. Well, he had other plans. He told me that he had become a follower of Jesus Christ and that he had put the picture of Jesus up because that's where him and his other Christians friends, from day shift, would go and have their bible study every day. He told me all about Jesus dying on a cross to save me from my sins and that He really loved me, and would come into my life and change me. I got down on my knees again and asked God to come into my life. My friend gave me a bible and I still have that bible sitting in my office. I think God used my friend to complete what He used Billy Graham to start years before. I learned that God wasn't waiting for me to mess up so He could punish me. He punished His son so that I could live. He loved me that much to pay that kind of price, just so I could be free. Nobody has ever loved me like that, and nobody ever can. Only God can do that. Loved? was the word that I carried around my neck for some twenty years of my life. Now I have replaced it with a new word. Loved. He really does love me and loves me like no one else ever can. Circumstances can change, people can change, and events can change, but His love for me and you will never change. At His last meal with twelve of His closet friends, right before He went to the cross, He said this to them; "No one has greater love than this -- that one lays down his life for his friends. You are my friends" John 15: 13-14 What's your 2 word story? Do you have a 2 word story?

10 Steps to Save Your Marriage

Do you ever wonder why no-one ever teaches us explicitly how to have a successful and fulfilling marriage or couple relationship, or how to save your marriage when it runs into trouble? Even more amazing, few couples set out to discover or develop this knowledge for themselves. There is some mistaken belief that knowing how to cook, and do DIY is sufficient. It is no small surprise then that when relationships or marriages hit a difficult time, usually after children come along, the vast majority of couples have no clue what to do. Consequently almost 50% of marriages and 75% of cohabiting relationships break down, many if not most unnecessarily. One of the things no-one tells us (probably because they don't know), is that relationships, like people, are meant to grow and develop. They do grow, of course, as couples become committed, marry, set up home and start a family, but then they tend to stagnate. That is when the spark goes and couples ask themselves "Is this it?" They then start to wonder if the marriage is over. They see each other's failings but are blind to their own. They blame each other, and tend to withdraw from each other physically, mentally and emotionally until they are totally disconnected. Eventually one or other of the couple becomes depressed with their lot and starts the "We need to talk" dialogue, and we all know where that leads; nowhere. Here are the 10 steps of the Mend It Don't End It process, to turn such a situation around. Step One: Park the Problem If you find yourselves continually talking about "the problem", that becomes a problem in itself, and only serves to put more distance between you. Paradoxical as it may seem, you need to put "the problem" aside, for now. It is crucial that the deteriorating situation is stabilized as soon as possible. Step Two: Commit To The Process One or preferably both of you needs to commit to this 10 Step process over a minimum 90 day period. There is a need to be wholehearted if you are to make the changes you hope for. Step Three: Make Your Marriage The Priority Your marriage hasn't got to the state of breakdown overnight, and it will take time and focused attention to turn it around. Your Marriage needs to be prioritized over your work, your leisure, your friends and family and even your children. It is in your children's best interests to have two parents in a fulfilling marriage, to each other. Step Four: Align and Reconnect It is not possible to resolve challenges or conflict from a position of being disconnected. It is important to reconnect with each other and get into alignment, becoming Allies instead of opponents. Step Five: Take Stock From a stable position of teamwork and partnership, you will begin to feel less tense and more hopeful, and better able to learn about how relationships work - or don't work! This is a chance to consider how your Human Needs are being met and how you are meeting your partner's Needs, also to examine each of your Values and how you can both honour them. Step Six: Stop Playing Games We all play Games, but most of us until we learn about them are unaware that we do so. Games are a dishonest attempt to get our needs met while creating an impression of being honest. The most destructive is The Blame Game, otherwise known as the Karpman Triangle. Step Seven: Embrace Emotional Honesty If Games are dishonest, then the way to overcome that is to become emotionally honest. A start with that is asking directly for what you want without prevaricating and hoping your partner can mind read. It is also about getting beyond being over concerned about what people think. Step Eight: Conflict Regulation Many couples don't understand that Conflict is usual and healthy in relationships. Many think the virtue lies in not having Conflict. What is unhealthy is having too much unregulated conflict, or avoiding it altogether, which may be worse. It is crucial to develop the skill of being able to talk openly and honestly about matters that trouble you and about which you disagree. That is the beginning of real emotional intimacy. Step Nine: Create Healthy Boundaries Couples generally don't know about or understand the significance of healthy Boundaries, and it is important to get this clear. We all have physical, mental, emotional and spiritual Boundaries, as well as couple and family Boundaries, which are often breached because people don't know they haven't got them in place. Make a point of finding out more about this important issue. Step Ten: Develop Vision and Relating Skills There is a well known Biblical scripture which says, "without a progressive Vision, the people perish". This points to the fact that we usually make happen whatever we visualize, for better or for worse. The operative word is progressive. As I mentioned, couples visualize getting married, having a home and perhaps a family together, but often don't go beyond that. It is important to create a Vision for the future you both wish to create. In order to do that you need to consciously develop your relating skills, such as Conflict Regulation, Communication, Understanding, Presence and Empathy. Relationship Development Remember, Relationships, like plants need to be regularly repotted, otherwise they become pot-bound! You owe it to yourself, your partner and your family to pay attention, not just to your personal and professional development, but also to your Relationship Development. As well as moving your marriage onto a new and more fulfilling level, you will be role modeling great relationship skills for your children and grandchildren. It is in your hands how your Family Tree may look in the future. Mend It - Don't End It. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8984240

Improve Your Relationships in 1 Hour

Arguing, yelling and screaming are the worst ways to believe that you can improve your relationships. Yet, everywhere you turn, people are doing just that. What they fail to understand, is that an environment of judgment ensues, along with increased disrespect and pain; a long way from trying to build what a person or couple really wants, and that is respect, appreciation, love and feeling valued. Just to name a few. So, what should a person do when they feel their partner; whether lover, friend or co-worker, refuses to listen or communicate effectively? It's easy to say, "walk away", but it's not that simple, because walking away does not address the issue of miscommunication. Should they write the relationship off? No, that is certainly not the thing to do, especially when dealing with a person you love and want to have a relationship with; or you are in the workplace and must work together. So, then, what is the answer? Here you will discover a few simple tips that can in fact get your relationships back on track. Ask yourself, what is really going on and how you can really deal with the situation. Next, be honest with your own responsibility in the relationship and take ownership of your part (in other words, stop blaming the other person all the time). Be fair. If you are in an intimate relationship, create a space of an hour to sit and listen (that means, you don't talk) you listen without a judgmental look or expression on your face. Don't laugh, I know a lot of people do this. Allow yourself to be okay with disagreeing without arguing. It's okay to disagree, be kind and allow others' to have their own opinions, even if it does not align with your own thoughts and beliefs. Practice, practice, practice kindness. At least 1 hour per day. Seriously! If you have a tendency to yell and scream, promise yourself and your partner that you will create a space of "no arguing" during the next conversation. Keep your promise. Expect that it takes time to change and allow such space to happen. Spend an hour a day working on you. Provide that space and time for you to reflect upon how you respond to yourself (your internal talk) and to others. Finally, if you find that you are always angry, hire a relationship coach or professional therapist to help you through the process of getting things together within yourself. Relationships are not as easy as people think they are, they do take time and work. You can create better relationships. You just have to be willing to admit that you and the other person are not perfect, but are improving. You owe it to yourself to improve you! Dr. Michelle Joy Brown, happily married for 24 years, loves working with people in relationships in distress. You can also follow her on Face Book at http://www.facebook.com/michellejoybrown or find ways to create your own recipes to success in your relationships at http://recipes2successnow.com/ Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8984501

Why Relationships Fail - Keep the Balance

Having an intimate, long term relationship with another person is a challenge and at the same time a very rewarding experience. The rewards form a great relationship range from peace and the contentment of unconditional love to the excitement of happiness and success. On the flip side unsuccessful relationships lead down a road of heartache, anger and poor self-confidence. Taking a look at why relationships fail can be the answer to the problems that you may be having with your own. Healthy relationships are a delicate balance of give and take. The more one side leans out of balance, the more one of the partners in the relationship gets the feeling that something isn't right. An unbalanced relationship is the core problem that presents itself in the form of other symptoms in an unhappy relationship. Maintaining balance in a relationship isn't about keeping tabs on what you've done and what your partner hasn't done. It's more about putting your ego aside and take the first step into giving. There's an old saying " When you give you get, and when you take you have to give." Another major reason as to why relationships fail is when we focus too much on the differences between one and another. When we pay too much attention to the differences it is easy to become very irritated. We need to be mindful of the fact that it's the differences between two people that make things interesting and challenging. Trying to change things about the other person that are different from yourself is pointless and frustrating. A healthy relationship focuses on the strengths of each individual, not any weaknesses. Remember we are all different and if we focus and complain about the things that bother us about our significant other, they are just going to complain about the things that get under their skin about us. This will create a vicious cycle of complaining and aggravating one another. Probably the number one reason why relationships fail is due to poor communication. Good communication is dependent on the listeners desire to listen with respect and to understand the other person better. If from the beginning of the relationship, there isn't good communication of important things such as, emotional needs, money practices, sexual needs, etc., both parties don't have a clear understanding of what their partner wants out of the relationship. When this happens, since there wasn't any clear boundaries established from the onset, the relationship begins to deteriorate when they are crossed. The feeling of turning an uncomfortable, mediocre relationship into a successful one cannot be surpassed. There are many opportunities to turn a failing relationship into a successful one, it just requires attentiveness and the desire to make it happen. Why relationships fail is beyond me, because if we want to be in a relationship we must have reasons, and not letting our partner know our wants from the beginning simply isn't fair to the other party involved. The most important factor for any healthy relationship to continue to be successful is maintaining that delicate balance. If you feel that your relationship is starting to feel a bit unbalanced, you must take action now to get your balance back. It's easier to regain that balance, than to try to figure out why relationships fail [http://www.relationship-self-help.org]. Visit the following site and watch a video that will help regain your balance. Watch the video Here [http://www.relationship-self-help.org]!

Signs Marriage is Over - 3 Early Warning Signs of a Divorce

As the Years go on in a marriage we may take our spouse for granted from time to time. The trick is to not let it happen too much and make sure they know how much we care about them. These signs a marriage is over apply to those who do not feel that their partner knows or cares that the relationship may not be working for both of you. Some people make terrific friends and neighbors but in their marriage they may be an insensitive or overbearing partner. This is often from a false sense of security that they can say or do anything to their spouse without fear of divorce. One partner taking advantage of the others vulnerabilities causes a rift in the relationships emotional connection. This is what is known as a toxic relationship. Even if you stay together forever the blissful marriage feeling will not be there unless problems are communicated. This can be fixed, but it will take time and effort. Check out the signs a marriage is over to see where you stand. One Way Street Do you feel like you have to bend over backwards to please your spouse? This forms a one sided relationship where your partner has all the control. This could manifest into a bossy attitude with incredibly high expectations of what you do. A healthy marriage needs to be 50/50 on everything. If the scale starts to become unbalanced the relationship becomes more difficult to maintain. If your partner flirts with members of the opposite sex right in front of you while you would never be "allowed" to do such a thing without a stern glance that is not fair and balanced. Always hanging out with their friends and co workers while you rarely see your own friends is unfair as well. This type of relationship is toxic to your self esteem and should not be tolerated. You do not have to yell, but stand up for yourself at all costs. Make sure responsibilities and leisure time are fair and balanced to avoid stress and resentment. Too Much Time Away If your spouse enjoys time away more than time spent with you there may be trouble ahead. It is completely normal and even recommended for couples to spend some time away from each other to maintain sanity. Absence truly makes the heart grow fonder. However if your significant other always spends time with friends and rarely, if ever, makes time to be together with you this is a sign that the relationship does not mean a great deal to them. That is not to say they want to leave necessarily, but they certainly lack respect for your time and feelings. Perhaps they are taking you for granted. If this is how you feel this should be communicated immediately. You should never feel you are your spouses second choice. Degrading Comments Belittling comments in front of friends or even in private can slowly tear away at your self esteem. Snide remarks about how you look, dress, act, talk or even constantly correcting your grammar can make you feel like you do not do anything right in their eyes. A cynical attitude does nothing but destroy relationships and end marriages. If not stopped this type of degrading will make you feel worse as time goes on. Communication barriers will prevent the two of you from fixing the issues that are dragging the both of you down as a couple. This should be confronted head on. Discuss with your spouse how you feel when they make demeaning remarks, especially in front of others. If they need to correct you or address a problem they could pull you aside to discuss it privately. If it is not important enough to pull you away from a crowd then it is probably not important enough to mention at all. Being in a toxic relationship is unhealthy and one of the biggest signs your a marriage is over. You may never get divorced, but you will continue to feel more and more miserable until these issues are dealt with. A one sided relationship is no relationship at all. These are signs a marriage is over if not confronted. If these problems exist in your marriage you must let it be known that you will not tolerate disrespect. If your spouse can not allow you to be a 100% equal then the marriage is over already. Save Your Marriage Its not too late to save your marriage even if you broke up. Watch this video for tips on how to save a relationship [http://free-top-notch-reviews.com/save_relat.html]. You can save your marriage or get your ex back [http://free-top-notch-reviews.com/save_relat.html] with proven methods.

One Sided Relationship, Attitudes That Promote a One Sided Relationship

Love by its very nature is giving and centered on the other person but to be honest most of us think of it as desirable mainly when we are on the receiving end. We enjoy being loved and pampered by someone and if they do not require much from us and we are self centered enough then we end up in a one sided relationship. This is an unbalanced relationship where one partner gives significantly more to the other and if you look into the relationship it seems like the giver is in the relationship alone since their partner puts little effort into the relationship and functions effectively like a single person. So what attitudes promote a one sided relationship? 1. I don't deserve him. If you believe that you don't deserve your partner then you will tend to go overboard to ensure that he stays with you. Because you feel that you don't deserve him then you don't place any expectations on him to reciprocate loving emotions or deeds to you. It is enough for him to just look in your direction every so often and you are ecstatically happy. You just bask in his presence as he is so beyond what you deserve. You are committed and he is not as you have given them permission to be whatever they want. If truth be told you are more of a worshiper than a partner and your idol (god) doesn't have to do anything to win your devotion. He already has it just by being. A totally one sided relationship. 2. I am not enough for him. This is similar to the first one except that here your focus is on yourself. You are insecure in who you are and you think that you have short changed your partner by being with them. You genuinely feel that you are lacking in some critical ways so that however much you try you cannot make them happy. With this attitude you communicate to your partner that he doesn't have to be faithful and true to you since you are deficient. They can go out of the relationship to fill in your deficiency. 3. All men are horrid but necessary. If you have this attitude then you expect your partner to short-change you every step of the way. You thus go in already expecting the worst so you excuse all his bad behavior since that's what you unconsciously signed up for. You go into the relationship expecting it to be one sided and you know what they say; you attract what you expect. So you get a one sided relationship. One sided relationships are actually about you since you teach people how to treat you. If you teach your partner that he doesn't have to be respect you or be fully committed to you then guess what happens with time; they learn the lesson and your relationship gets increasingly one sided. Rosy Anderson is a researcher in social economic issues and the way they affect decision making and she enjoys writing and being in relationships. However if you want to become the woman who a man will give 101% of himself to then get these 12 relationship secrets to guide you to become that woman. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6185490