This is basically what happens in most relationships: you meet someone new, be it online, at a bar, or your preferred place to pick up. You hook up with the person depending on the amount of chemistry you have with them. You go through the "honeymoon" period and the first few months is a lot of fun. They haven't shown their "true" side yet, but as times goes by, you will see and more of them.
They say absence makes the heart grow fonder and unfortunately, the adverse is true. The longer you're with someone, the more flaws you see, the more the aura wears off.
The following three points are common traps that people in relationships have to look out for if they want to last as long as they can. I know that I've tripped over all three of these traits sometime in my life. They might be painful to admit, but a bit of short-term pain is worth a lot of long-term pleasure:
1. Being unrealistic: this ties in with the fact that at the start of a relationship, you don't know much about the other person. You see their good side. They don't show their bad side. You live with them a little and you find out that they're actually someone you don't really get along with. Sharing dreams is also a part of this. It can reveal a lot about the person you're dating, but you have to keep things in perspective to last longer.
Any long-term, real relationship is about these sort of experiences, not the "glow" you get at the beginning, during the honeymoon phase. If you live just for that phase, you're emotionally immature and just aren't cut out for long-term relationships.
2. Inability to effectively communicate: Men are from Mars, women are from Venus. That's what they say, right? We might as well be, because at times, it seems like we don't even speak the same language. Women are the fairer sex and like speaking with their emotions. Men tend to like stonewalling themselves, blocking themselves out from the rest of the world until they solve their problem. This doesn't work out nicely, does it? Communication is about arriving at a mutual conclusion through understanding and listening. Not just talking. It takes time and you just have to ask yourself: is your partner worth learning a new language for?
3. Don't confuse sex with love: Us guys are physical beings. No doubt about it. Why do you think we're so often called the "strong, silent type"? We love sex. Let's not pretend that we don't. We just have to learn to use it as a tool to express how we feel. This ties in with point 2 up the top. It is a physical activity, but the deeper emotional level is for those who are in a real relationship.
Us guys also use sex to gauge our masculinity. It feels good to us knowing that we're able to pleasure our woman and that we're "the best she's ever had". That sometimes gets in the way of us actually using sex as a tool to express our emotions. The simple fact of the matter is, we can never be "the best she's ever had" if we're unable to simply make love to her. Sex isn't a competition. It's an act of love, hence "love-making".
Bear in mind as well that while sex might be an integral part of your relationship at the moment, it will inevitably become something that will dwindle in significance as time passes, particularly as you get onto your twilight years. This is where all the ground work you put in early in the relationship will become important; if you relied heavily on physical, animalistic sex that lacked depth, then you're going to end up with a stranger.
If you've found someone who you love dearly, I hope that this love relationship advice will aid you in being with them for as long live. There is nothing more rewarding than being with someone who understands you who you can share your life with. Your connection can last as long as you want, if you avoid the common traps that accompany long-term relationships.
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